rewired >< amplify

Cupid and His Three Arrows

2012-02-03T02:00:00.000-05:00

It’s February, the month many males dread and females hopeexpectantly for roses.

If God had not made us relational beings then I feel verystrongly the drama in life would be close to non-existent and we would achievea civilization like that of the Vulcans from Star Trek, who have no realemotional attachments to anything but see only logical solutions. This relational aspect is how God made usunique--that’s what makes humans different than most other creatures here onearth.

We are relational beings who longto show our love towards others and in doing so we are imitate God’s love forpeople.

The question is what exactly is love? We will answer thatspecifically next week, but today we want to focus on the three types of love that exist--eros,phileo, and agape.

Eros is theeasiest to remember and the one that is plastered just everywhere inour culture. Eros is simply erotic. God intended this kind of love to be sharedstrictly between one man and one woman. This love is expressed through sex. (Matthew 19:4-6) God intended sexto be part of marriage and is one action that helps hold a marriagetogether.

Phileo is the nextform of love. This is your brotherlylove. You like some people yet you maynot like others. All of us have bestfriends or people we trust and would help out in a heartbeat. This is where we find phileo love comes into play. This usually doesn’t mean we would go and help just anybody, but wewould help those particular persons for whom we have a fondness or who are our closefriends.

Lastly we have agapelove. Agape is choosing to seek the best for anybody. This is what Christians are called to. We are called to agape-love everyone on thisearth, “looking not only to our own interest but also to the interest ofothers.” (Philippians 2:4). We act in a respectful loving manner towardsall people even when we do not get alongwith them or particularly like them. Weare not called to always agree with all people, but we are called to be compassionate and respectful towards everyonein how we talk and interact with them.

Check out this link for a little more clarity: http://www.evangelical.us/love.html

--Nick

I love words and my kids. I love pizza as well as the iPhone. I love autumn and I love my friend Kristin. I love God and I love the beggar on thestreet. I love my dog. Okay, truthfully that last one might be a bitof a stretch, but you get the picture.

English is a difficult language to understand at timesbecause I just used the same word to describe how I feel about pizza (which Iwould eat at every meal given the opportunity) and how I feel about my kids(who I would die for in an instant, consider me under the bus, off the cliff,into the burning house…). What!?! Greek on the other hand is much more demonstrativein its language. That’s why we have thethree words above, eros, phileo, and agape, as Nick explained. They all mean love, but by just using that specific word, you immediately knowhow you love them. Here in America wehave like and love. Think about it, you’veseen these words before. As Nick said,there is erotic which stems from eros and let’s not forget the City ofBrotherly Love, Philadelphia.

So what does this look like for reals?

First of all, our friend eros,if you aren’t married, you shouldn’t be practicing this. PERIOD.

Exclamation point.

I know, I’m a kill joy, a buzz kill, a no-fun adult. I don’tunderstand, but I do understand and when I was nineteen I didn’t listen to God’scommand about eros.

The product?

She just turned six and she is in Kindergarten.

Sure, maybe you won’t get pregnant, maybe you won’t get anSTD, but as long as you are not married, sex will never be as great as it could be because frankly, if it’soutside of marriage, God’s not blessing it. And life sucks when you don’thave God’s blessing.

Brotherly love.

Phileo.

This type of love is probably the easiest of the three. This is the love for the people youlike. If you like someone, if you twoare friends, you have similar interests and you know each other well, this isnatural. For example, I know my friendslove sweets. When I bake cookies orbaklava or other yummy goodies, I take them to my friends because I (again,excuse the conjugations) phileothem. I don’t mind cooking them a mealbecause they are my friends and it’s whatfriends are for. I love them because I like them and we get along.

Agape is the most difficult, yet this is the path weare called to walk because this is the path Jesus walked. I was bullied in school growing up and I didn’talways agape love my meaniesback. I still see these people grown upand sometimes harbor resentment towards them. They made my elementary and junior high years a living hell; so much sothat I would try to get sent home from school almost every day just so I wouldn’thave to be there. These are the ones I am called to love. The person that makes you feel about threeinches tall; the one that is rude to you, the person who has body odor andeveryone else teases and you’ll be made fun of if you befriend them—Jesus saysgo to that one.

Who is your “that one”this week?

Which of these ismost difficult for you?

picture source

How You Treat Your Mom

2012-01-27T01:00:00.000-05:00

When I entered junior high and especially senior high girls were at theforefront of most of my thoughts. At some point I started noticing them and attempted interacting withthe female population other than my mom or my sisters. However, I wasn’t the smoothest talker orthe most attractive guy so I was rather awkward. I did things to try andimpress the ladies that may have, more or less, discouraged their interactionwith me.

I eventually grew out of my awkward stage in my junior and senior years of high school, but I learned a very important lesson during that awkward time--most of us learn how to act in a dating relationship by what we read andwatch and fill our minds with. With somany of us coming from broken homes we lose some of life’s most importantlessons. We begin to think that what is normal (a broken home) is actually the way things are supposed to be and the rightway of doing things.

My parents aren't divorced and as a result I learned alot from my dad on how I should interact with women. He has always treated my mom with the utmostrespect and taught me a fairly valuable lesson by modeling how to interact with women for me day afterday by how he respected my mom. He never yelled at my mom, thoughthey did have their arguments. He never demeaned her or told her she wasworthless. In fact he went out of hisway to do things for her and always took her side in an argument with one of uskids. He showed me how to respect women.

Because of the way in which he treated my mom I have a respect for myself andtake pride in who I am. If my parentsdemeaned each other in front of me that would make me feel pretty lousy becauseif they couldn’t stand be around each other what does that mean for me?

For all you ladies reading this, how a man treats his motheris the best indicator of how he will treat you. My counterpart on this blog may or may not agree with the next statement, but I'm going to write it anyways--the way in which a lady treats her father will tell you how she will treatyou.

Just because you may come from abroken home does not mean you can not take pride in yourself and how you, yourself treat others. God tells us thatwe are not mistakes but that He created us and loves us immensely, which meanshe loves others that much too.

So men, how have you been treating your mom lately?

--Nick

Hey everyone, it’s the resident female counterpart writing now and I’m sure you’ve already gathered that we’re talking about respectingyourself and respect in relationships. First of all, the threshold of respect in a relationship is set byyou. You get to control how much peoplerespect you by the way you dress, the way you speak, and the way in which you carry yourself. It’sup to you. Don’t settle.

Unless you’ve been hiding under a rock since birth you’veprobably figured out that girls’ bodies are a bit different than our malecounterparts and the way you accentuate those features says a lot about you andhow you value yourself. Put bluntly,cover up, ladies.

Can you remember the last time one of your friends wore alow-cut shirt? Remember how the guys alltalked to her and not to you and then you got all “I’m so sad because no guysare talking to me.” Let me assure you,they weren’t talking to her because they thought she knew the answers to thehomework or because they thought she was cool. They were talking to her because she was flaunting her stuff and theyweren’t focused on her words. Oh no,they were focused on…her stuff. I’m notsaying you have to wear a muu-muu, I’m just saying, keep in mind what you areshowing and remember that it says something about how much you respectyourself.

Secondly, guys, here’s what I expect from you. Think about your sister. Yes, I know in your eyes she’s not really agirl, she’s your sister, but think about a guy looking at her the way youlooked at that girl walking down the hall the other day. Think about what went on in your head goingon in his head about your sister. Notcool, bro; not cool.

When we acceptChrist we are all adopted as brothers and sisters into his family, so thatgirl, the one you like, yeah, she’s like your sister. Treat her as such!

Also, HANDS OFF! HANDS OFF! HANDS OFF! It’s like there is abig sign on each and every girl (and guy for that matter) that says “Propertyof ________ Do Not Touch,” except we just can’t read the name yet. You can bet there is a name there, but sinceyou aren’t married yet, we can’t see it. So like I said, hands off.

Like Nick said, how a guy treats his mom is ahuge indicator of how he will treat his wife and likewise how we ladies respect our dads can show how we may treat our husbands. Why is that? We are called to respect and obey our fathers (parents). Once you get married, ladies, God expects youto respect your husband. If you can’trespect your dad (even if he’s done things that make it hard) you will probablystruggle respecting your husband. Whenyou are dating look for a guy you can respect now. If you can’t respect his decisions or actions,then it’s time to re-evaluate.

Agree?

Disagree?

Either way, we want to hear what you have to say!

--Kristina

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who made you king?

2012-01-20T01:30:00.000-05:00

Let every person be subject to the governingauthorities. Romans 13:1

Now if respect is how much we value someone then what aboutthose in positions of authority in our lives? Every single one of us has had to deal with a teacher, principal,parents, or some other form of authority.

We need to realize that God has specifically placed us in theenvironment we find ourselves in. He hasspecifically allowed people to be in positions of authority over every one ofus and He calls us to respect those in authority because their power comes fromHim. Meaning, they ultimately will have to answer to Him for their actions. So how then are we to respond to our

teachers,

parents,

youth leaders,

police, etc.?

If you are a believer in Jesus Christ you are called to be subjectto all those in authority, so long as they are not making or forcing you to dothings that are against God. If we readRomans 12 completely we see that we are to strive to live at peace with thosein authority so that they have nothing against us.

Ultimately we are responsible for our actions andaccountable to God who is the maker and creator of all things. All authority is given by God but like theold saying goes "…with great power comes great responsibility…” and those inauthority-parents, police, teachers etc., will be judged more severely thanthose not in authority. It is our dutythen to act in a manner that would allow those in authority over us to fulfilltheir responsibility with ease and a desire to lead/teach us.

When you disrespect authority you are not only showingcontempt/disrespect to authority but you are showing disrespect to the Creatorof the universe- God.

So based on thatfact, how much disrespect have you shown towards your teachers and parentslately?

We have all shown disrespect towards authority figures, the question is

what are you going to do now to change that?

--Nick

I had a huge issue with authority when I was in high school. I didn't defy them or badmouth them out rightly and I would never have been classified as a rebel; my disrespect was quieter, more like an undercurrent of dissent. I didn't like that certain people in authority would misuse and abuse their authority to be a bully. That fact always made me super angry. Even in a situation where I approved of the person in authority I still wasn't necessarily thrilled with them having authority over me. Can you say 'control issues'?

Yep.

Authority can be defined as "...a power or right; delegated or given...". I appreciate that definition because it reminds me that the real authority lies with God first. Any authority that any person here on this earth holds is only because it has first been delegated to them by God and with that authority comes immense responsibility. Unfortunately (or maybe fortunately) that dictates how I need to treat someone in authority whether or not I like them--I MUST respect them.

If I claim to love God, then I must submit to their authority because they are just an extension of God's authority over me. When I disrespect them, I disrespect God. Kind of puts it in perspective, huh?

In light of that what do I need to change?

Sure, I'm an adult. I set the curfew now, but I still have authority figures in my life. I still answer to God. My pastor is an authority figure. My boss is in a position of authority over me.

Authority figures never go away because God never goes away. They may change, but God will continually write different people into your life as extensions of his authority.

Who is an authority figure in your life?

Are you respectful of them

or is that something you need to work on?

--Kristina

R.E.S.P.E.C.T...

2012-01-13T02:00:00.000-05:00

“So God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him; male and female he created them.”

Genesis 1:27

What we know then is that all humans are created in the image of God; meaning every single person on this planet is created by God and they reflect who God is. Why is this important? Because it tells us that every single person has an immense value (check out Psalm 139). And this word respect is how we show/tell people how much they are valued.

If you looked up the word respect in the dictionary there are several definitions for this word. It is defined as, “esteem for a sense of the worth or excellence of a person, a personal quality or ability, or something considered as a manifestation of a personal quality or ability.”

The key part that you should look at is the sense of worth or excellence of a person. That’s why the phrase, "your actions speak louder than words" resonates with so many people. Your actions towards them indicate how much they are valued.

In our culture, respect is not simply given to people freely, it's earned, and I would agree that respect is something that is earned over a period of time to some extent. We do give respect to all people, especially those in authority over us, but the degree to which we respect someone will be dictated by their actions towards us--your actions will cause people to either respect you more or less. The key to take away is that everyone deserves your initial respect. How they respond to that, either negatively or positively, will determine the level of respect given in the future.

--Nick

"I believe human trafficking exists because someone looks at a child, a woman, a man and doesn’t see God’s image. And the consequences of that are grave and heartbreaking."

source

"From the topic of respect to human trafficking, that's a pretty big jump," you say. Yes, it is, but at the heart of human trafficking lies the issue of respect and when we stop showing respect to the image of God that resides in each of our souls, our feet begin to slide down a ditch and into the social mire of exploitation. It all begins with knowing our value; knowing your value.

The fact that you are here, living and breathing gives you worth--as Nick said, it is an intrinsic (you were born with it), God-given worth and that also means that every other person here, from your best friend to the kid who drives you nuts in study hall has the same intrinsic worth.

So let's talk about that worth.
How much are you worth?
.
What if I told you, you were worth blood; artery filling, life-giving, oxygen-providing blood? You are worth breath and life, heaven and all the stars. You are God's crowning creation. The one made to mirror Him.

And since you are, worth blood, that is, how would you get that blood?
Someone, Jesus, had to die and I don't think you can really argue with that as far as deserving respect. We deserve respect, not because of who you are, but because of Who made you.

In a culture that denies the need for respect, how can you be different? How can you demonstrate a concern and recognition of God-given value towards others in your every day life?

Is there anyone you know that you should respect, but you don't?

How could you change that?

--Kristina